know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em… (mostly)


Ugh, too much work to post! I’m still alive.

At the gym this morning, step class took a LOT out of me. I stayed for the full hour, but it was a struggle. Energy has been lacking. Lots of fatigue recently, some general achiness…

I’ve had this achiness a lot over the past week. (Partially because I’ve been skipping the ibuprofen to combat the Rebif side-effects… it can be a migraine trigger…) And I’ve realized that if I used “mild achiness” as an excuse every time, I’d never work out. Most days, if I’m not too bad off, I work through it, sometimes modifying what I do (Friday, my shoulders ached, so I did a hard leg workout that I’m still feeling. And my upper back felt better in the end!).

Today, when I was pushing through and felt really dizzy when I bent over to pick up my water bottle, I thought, should I have bagged it early today? Is this one of those days? I doubt it’s nutrition, since I’ve been taking care of that pretty well. I’m always so afraid to stress out my body, for fear of triggering another relapse–but most of the time, pushing through everything is what I need to keep myself going.

(I have a deep fear of missing too many days of working out, because with over 25 lesions between cerebrum/cerebellum/pons/brain stem and spinal cord, I’m afraid of any deterioration!! Who’s with me?)

Anyway, it’s a learning process, and one of these days, I’ll learn more about my new body. For now, I’ll still push to find my limits.

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