Earlier today, I went poking around the net for blogs written by fellow MS patients. I haven’t looked too far yet, but between this morning’s blog search and last week’s looking through personal testimony on youtube, the overall theme has been “my life SUCKS since my MS diagnosis!”

Not that unicorns have been jumping over rainbows in my life, by any means. It hasn’t been easy, especially the past two weeks, when I had the 5 g of IV prednisone and its side-effects plus starting 3x/weekly injections of beta-interferon (to hopefully delay future relapses). The combined side-effects of both, plus having caught a cold while immunosuppressed from the steroids, plus keeping up work as if nothing is different…

But it’s amazing how attitude influences so much in life. I still approach my teaching with a smile on my face, and often by the end of the hour, any pain I started with is entirely gone. (When you focus on others rather than your own problems… it’s amazing what happens!) Rather than pushing people away and becoming more cloistered since my diagnosis, I’ve started developing even deeper relationships with some of my close friends. Perhaps it’s because I don’t talk about how much my life sucks.

Furthermore, yes… every time I’m in the weight room at the gym and I can’t do what I used to do, there’s that little voice that wonders if I’ll ever be able to build back what I’ve lost. That’s the fear of the unknown with MS–everyone’s symptoms are slightly different. I may be able to build back some strength, all of my strength, or no strength–totally unpredictable. But I’m not going to get mentally soft over that. Gotta stay tough. I’m still going to work my hardest with the body that I have. If I didn’t work out, my body would just fall into disrepair that much more quickly! (as well as my mind…)

I was reading one blog entry earlier today where a gentleman talked about how so many of the MS meds did nothing for him over the past few years… and he went on to discuss his “diet” of soda and pizza. I’m sure that didn’t contribute anything to the meds not working! That’s yet another discussion… but I’m hoping that through maintenance of my mostly whole foods diet (which I kept even pre-diagnosis!) and working my body to its limits, that I’ll stay physically and mentally positive… and remain a source of inspiration for MS patients.

And that’s what I’d like this blog to be: inspiration to those who share my journey, and even to those who don’t.


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